so something happened.
something unpleasant.
not earth-shaking.
not life-changing.
but unsettling all the same.
and you want to hide away from the world.
a normal and natural reaction.
especially when life presents you with
an overwhelming display of i-don’t-want-this
all at once.
when confronted with these circumstances,
we react.
perhaps we retreat.
time to go back and recall the events as they unfolded.
to pick out the parts you can be proud of.
(yes, they’re there – even in your darkest moments.)
did you do what was immediately necessary?
did you remove yourself from the situation?
did you perhaps cry?
good news then.
all positive.
each would enable you to feel better in the short term,
and allow you to begin dealing more calmly with the problem
moving forward.
now set some healthy limits and wise boundaries for the next time.
physically act out different scenarios to help crystallize them in your mind.
remember to keep your priorities uppermost.
pay attention to what exhausts you (and decrease those activities).
pay attention to what energizes you (and increase these activities).
remember it is absolutely okay to say no when you need to or want to.
to anyone.
(especially when it means saying yes to yourself.)
it’s easy to see how others are behaving and reacting.
but it is very difficult to see the way our own actions are playing out.
dig deep, engage in perceptive introspection.
analyze your own behaviors that might be leading to
unhealthy (and possibly unnecessary) grief on your part.
finally, trust yourself.
do what you think is right.
don’t be so hard on yourself.
don’t listen to others’ opinions (including mine)
if they don’t speak to your soul.
this is your life.
seize the wonderful opportunities you have to choose.
each and every day.
and smile.
enjoy as many moments as you can.
*******
“and you, when will you begin that long journey into yourself?”
~rumi
is it time to stop imagining your best life,
time to begin living it instead?
is it time to reconnect with your essence,
time to do what brings you joy?
stay tuned for details about my new e-course.
coming this april.
open to all women.
i’ll share the personal philosophy that has been my driving force.
because it is your time.
*******
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The sagest piece of advice here is to listen to no “advice” but your own. There are so many great steps to take, in terms of coping when the shit hits the fan, however, sometimes there’s nothing for it but to curl in. I’ve learned, when I follow that urge in my body, that I very quickly discover a light – a sense of joy – deep inside of me. Once I find that…and sometimes I need to curl in very deeply to find it, the energy to move forward comes naturally, and is so much more sustainable than when I move forward by rote.
“it is absolutely okay to say no…especially when it means saying yes to yourself” Yes!
this is your life.
seize the wonderful opportunities you have to choose.
each and every day.
and smile.
enjoy as many moments as you can.
I think I’ll take that ‘essence’ into my day. Thank you!
“remember it is absolutely okay to say no when you need to or want to.
to anyone.
(especially when it means saying yes to yourself.)”
This line really touched me! As a recovering people pleaser, it is still hard for me to say “no”, but when you put it like that, it doesn’t seem so bad! Thanks for the heart talk this week, April. Wonderful and timely as always!!
Sometimes retreat is far better than rash action! <3
As women, we often address the needs of others before addressing our own. I am trying to acknowledge my needs and honor their boundaries. I remind myself that I can only give when my own cup is full!
Great advice – I often find myself “hiding”. Thank you for the motivation to face the world.
Great post. Each time in get triggered by something and want to hide away, it teaches me a lot about myself.
After some initial nurturing to re-balancing I get curious about whatever it was that triggered me and start to look at my reactions. I used to care far too much about what others thought of me. I’m slowly learning that it’s not really my businesses and it’s really ok that I’ll never please everyone (and that it isn’t my job to try).