this move to europe has been a long time coming.
we’ve been planning it for years,
the last fifteen months focused on
getting to italy and villa magnolia.
i’m following my dream, but it hasn’t been without hardships.
it’s been a difficult transition so far,
leaving behind everyone and everything familiar.
saying goodbye not just to my family and friends,
not just to my home,
but to my lifestyle as i knew it.
it’s definitely a trade-off to completely uproot
and move to another country.
giving up this for that, one thing for another.
and the bureaucratic path to declaring residency hasn’t been easy.
“you need this document to get that certificate,
but you can’t get that certificate until you get this document.”
on and on and on.
hours and hours spent, going around in circles.
(with a lawyer in milan on the phone and an italian-speaking friend in person.)
we’ll get there eventually,
but so much depends upon its quick resolution.
receipt of our shipment, buying a car, my long-term visa.
loneliness and isolation.
frustration and angst.
having to let go of all expectations
and just go with the flow.
not my nature, not my disposition.
you know what has brought me to tears since i’ve been here?
the little things.
no paint samples to bring home from the hardware store.
different over-the-counter medicine than i’m used to taking.
no trader joe’s dark chocolate peanut butter cups.
my dearly-loved hair dryer’s european adapter malfunctioning,
and our inability to find a replacement.
no unsweetened iced tea at mcdonald’s.
substitutes for this, substitutes for that.
not my favorites or familiars.
and then there are the rooms to scrub,
the wallpaper to remove,
the walls to paint,
the broken to be fixed,
the tired to be refreshed.
and our bedroom and kitchen and office and laundry room and closet
(all terms used loosely) currently occupying one space.
but . . .
did i just hear justin bieber at the electronics store
and adam levine at the gelato shop?
popular american music, heard everywhere in the world.
and my husband, always trying to make me feel better.
mixing milk and cream to create half-n-half for my special daily latte.
the friendly, helpful, warm people also, in the bustling villages all around.
including a new forever friend who’s willing to move mountains for us.
exciting areas to explore, rich with history.
stunning views and landscapes, right outside my window.
and a magical reawakening of villa magnolia.
preparing to welcome women with intrepid souls,
ready to chase and catch their most cherished dreams,
with eyes wide open.
“all changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy;
for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves.
we must die to one life before we can enter another.”
~anatole france
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Wow, April, that’s certainly very “raw”.. and so honest, and brave – what a gorgeous piece; thank you.
The journey ‘without’, inevitably brings with it a journey within, doesn’t it? I think we’re even surprised, sometimes, by how much we need to grow, actually, when we give up what you describe – the familiar – even just for a family trip.. Do we even think about it? We ought to.. 🙂
Congratulations – on everything.. I feel proud of what you’re doing – must be a ‘sister’ thing! I think because, you are doing it for us all – leading the way – thank you, with all of my heart. 🙂
thank you for these kind words, michelle. i can certainly agree that this will be a growth experience like none other!
We’ve been here 3 years now and I still feel these heart wrenching moments. Things will get better, it’s such early days and such a huge change, just today I was melancholy for what I left behind….it comes with leaving a little piece of you heart behind. xx
words i needed to hear, lisa. and yes, i’ve definitely left two big pieces of my heart behind – my sons, alexander and nicholas.
I admire you for taking this on.. It is a beautiful goal and your ultimate plan will help so many – and you will grow to new heights that you never imagined. When you have those moments.. think of how many people do not follow their dreams. While it is not always perfect and it is scary sometimes, as you already point out, you have found so much to celebrate already!
yes, pam, there is much to celebrate. and following one’s dreams is never an easy undertaking. i am focusing on my end goal – opening my home to women who take brave steps.
Oh, my the scenery out your window! I know you loved your landscape back in the West of the USA, but this is breath taking. The Villas is going to be the most amazing retreat home…and I know the challenge as I have lived in and renovated an entire home, but the satisfaction when the gorgeous paint and decor comes together will be priceless! You not only have changed your lives, but will change the lives of so many women.
the view is truly stunning, jul’s. it catches my breath each day! thank you for your support and encouragement – it means a lot. and i am eagerly looking forward to opening the villa up for retreats! 🙂
Gosh, I can only imagine what the red tape is like in Italy. But, what incredible views you have from your villa. And that detail on your bedroom ceiling is amazing. Looking forward to reading your next post to see what progress you’ve made towards moving to follow your dream.
thanks for visiting my global studio, angela! 🙂 (and for following my story.)
Just beautiful April. As always, raw and real! Such courage it takes to do as you have and make your dream a reality! You inspire all of us. Thank you for the pictures that show us you’re making it work, and you’re hopeful things will bit by bit get better. It’s the little things, like you said, that can hurt the most, but it’s also what can bring us the greatest joy! Thank you for sharing your heart here as always – you’ve got a lot of fans rooting for you!! <3
your words always make me feel good, april. thank you for cheering me on throughout this journey. i am so grateful for your presence in my life. <3
Change like you are experiencing is never easy but the growth and awareness and opportunities that are going to come your way will be endless xxx every day gets easier and pretty soon you will be flying 🙂
thanks for the vote of confidence, angela. i am committed to flying! 🙂
Every rose definitely has its thorn. The fragrance, the colors, the velvety soft petals, are all worth the attempt to grab hold of it. Sounds like your dreams definitely have rewards that are greater than the frustrations. Good luck always.
thank you for this beautiful analogy, dawn. (and thanks for helping to ease my son’s transition as well.)