i’ve been exploring / imagining / pondering several different words for 2020. and honestly? i’ve never had such a hard time choosing my word of the year!
several have been considered. two speak to me the loudest . . .
first, MOMENTUM. i like this word’s possibilities.
- providing fuel for my efforts
- jumpstarting me when and where i need it
- suggesting a stick-with-it vibe over time
however, i’m still feeling emotionally vulnerable following my dad’s death, and this word just feels kind of big to me right now.
i’ve also been thinking (a lot) about the word SOLACE.
- offering a haven-like sense of peace
- hearing my thoughts, feeling my feelings, healing my hurts
- reconnecting with myself while creating a renewed perspective of the world
it keeps calling to me, beckoning to me with its innate comfort. so i think “yeah, I’m not ready for MOMENTUM yet. i’ll stick with SOLACE for awhile, then move on.”
and then it doesn’t seem like enough all by itself.
so i imagine two words for 2020 – SOLACE for the first 6 months, MOMENTUM for the second half of the year. (i’d done that before, another year in the past, and it worked well.)
but no, still doesn’t feel right. though I’m grieving and trying to find my way again, i’m still planning, scheduling things, moving forward.
finally, in an awake portion of my nighttime sleep, i realize that i’m making this too difficult. that i can have BOTH words. together. simultaneously.
i can mourn while in motion, i can grieve and still go. i can seek things that console and soothe me when needed. and i can push through barriers, maintaining my cadence and increasing my effectiveness, at the same time.
serenity and clarity. tranquility and vitality. hand-in-hand. kind of like life itself.
????ℂ? / ???? / ????ℕ???
??????? ??????
????????????? ????????
yeah? maybe? hmmm . . .
i still really like my 2019 word *EXHALE* though. and i still desperately need it. (perhaps i should keep it as a 2020 support word?)
and there are several other possible-but-less-likely choices still whirling around in my brain as well (here’s a partial list):
•RHYTHM (untangling the many thoughts/feelings i have surrounding this word and why it might be perfect)
•EQUILIBRIUM (a worthy contender, eric mentioned this word when i tried to explain how i’ve been feeling since my dad’s death)
•EVOLVE (still doing this @ almost-57, will always be doing this)
•JET (something about starting the new year in an airplane, traveling from my home continent to my newish world in europe)
i’m always the first to say “don’t overthink the process. let the word come to you.” but this year? huh. it’s just not happening for me.
i don’t know, i don’t know, i don’t know.
what word has chosen YOU for 2020?
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