we share our lives, our personal stories, through our words. it is the way we engage and interact and exist on a daily basis, the way we survive in this big wide world. we all know how vitally important it is to be listened to and understood. but it’s always a fine line – how much to reveal to the world and how much to hold close. and sometimes we find it easier to stay hidden, to wallow in the dark places. afraid to reach out, afraid to speak up and speak out. because speaking up isn’t easy. we worry that it will leave us feeling vulnerable and frightened. every time we put ourselves out there, we take a chance that we may not be heard. we may even be ridiculed.
and yet . . . you need a voice. unless you are able to speak up, to find your voice and use it, you cannot take important next steps that are required to move forward. VOICE is one of the essential elements of THE ARRIVAL, my essence7 philosophy. i see it as a crucial ingredient of the wellness recipe. having a voice is the process by which you integrate who you truly are with the way you present yourself to the world. and, more importantly, with the way you see yourself. it is a transformational step in the process of regaining one’s self. and it must be done. for without a voice, you are ultimately without an essence.
so what does it mean, to make sure your voice is heard? does it mean to always speak up, no matter how uncomfortable you may feel? does it mean to be the loudest, to talk the longest, to forever have the last word? does it mean to fling out a torrent of bitter angry words? does it mean to always share your opinion, even when you haven’t carefully considered both sides?
no. not at all. making sure your voice is heard isn’t a source of discomfort. it’s not a competition. it isn’t a debate. it means not feeling fearful or intimidated when you recognize the need to stand up for yourself. it also means not intimidating others when you communicate your message. it means knowing that what you think matters, while acknowledging that others have the right to be heard as well and granting them this choice.
having a voice doesn’t mean you have to be a social butterfly. everyone is different, and that’s what makes the world interesting. personal storytelling is the act of connecting with another human being, of being heard without judgment. having a voice means communicating your story to someone else, your disappointments and your joys, no matter how introverted or extroverted you might be. having a voice means finally finding the answers to the questions you’ve always been too afraid to ask. having a voice means embracing honesty, in yourself and with others.
each of us has a voice. but we often fail to use it effectively, for many different reasons.
do you allow yourself the chance to speak your truth? do you welcome your own anecdotes, narratives, and sagas? it is difficult at times to tell your story, to raise up your voice. you have to have a sense of what you’re all about, a sense of self.
when you start speaking, perhaps only to yourself at first (and that’s okay), you begin unraveling exactly who you are, delving into the experiences that have shaped you and brought you to this very point. speaking aloud opens up doors that were formerly closed. you learn why you do the things you do, how you can change what’s not working, and even ways to fine-tune your potential. we are all entitled to this opportunity.
how then do you find and use your voice, especially if it’s been silent for a long time?
today . . . begin.
if you don’t feel like roaring (yet), begin with a whisper. but begin.
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