the need to understand,
to decipher,
to define the voluminous and overwhelming puzzles.
the mysteries life tosses at us
(sometimes buries us with)
each day.
impossibilities.
but here,
in my tiny place in the universe,
i attempt to sort them out,
to filter through,
to bring sense to my existence.
a monumental task to be sure,
yet one i feel compelled to continue,
to conquer.
as do you, as do others.
and as each piece becomes illuminated
and adds to the coherent design of solutions,
i feel stronger.
lighter.
better able to wake each morning
with hope.
some days are filled with pattern-connecting and elation.
others i barely see through the fog.
but soldier on i must.
you must too.
because living is explaining the chaos,
claiming the space we’ve been given,
taking ownership of the lessons and eventualities.
experiencing the clarity.
~~~~~~~
how do you attempt to explain the chaos in your little corner of the world?
how do you feel when you are able to achieve a sense of harmony?
Most of the time I don’t attempt to explain my internal chaos to others because I’m not sure they would understand. There are very few people in my life who can make sense of my emotions when I can’t, and in with those few, I vent and cry…I ramble and rant…and I am me. And that is when the harmony sets in! Then, as you write, I feel lighter and full of hope.
“i vent and cry…i ramble and rant…and i am me.” lovely unique you, stacey! thanks for sharing your vulnerable side. 🙂
I deal with chaos by feeling what’s going on inside. My therapist has taught me to stop- remove the stories- and just see what’s present in the body. 🙂
what a beautiful method of exploration, jamie.
This is beautiful! Thank you for the encouraging words. 🙂
I stop and dig in. I used to let chaos control me, but I do a check in and ask what do I need to learn and why is this considered chaotic to me. It helps. Great post.
i like the question you ask yourself, yvelette: “why is this considered chaotic to me?” looking at it from an entirely different perspective.
I just write. An that explains it to me. And I surrender. That allows me to go there. And well, sometimes, I just talk 🙂 It’s good to hear yourself sometimes 🙂 Great post April. xo
this is my go-to method as well, elizabeth. it all starts to make sense, the patterns begin to connect, as i write.
“because living is explaining the chaos,
claiming the space we’ve been given,
taking ownership of the lessons and eventualities.
experiencing the clarity.”
Love that! When I feel chaos inside, my urge is to try to control what’s around me on the outside. You remind me that chaos is part of life (isn’t entropy the natural tendency?), to take in the clarity when it comes.
yes, cathy, we often attempt to control the uncontrollable chaos in our lives!
Whether things are chaotic or peaceful I always check in spiritually for the lessons. When I take a moment and reflect I realize the messages repeat until I get it.
“the messages repeat until i get it.” they are patient with us, aren’t they, susie? 🙂
It’s been a chaotic week. A chaotic month, actually. This post is very timely in my world.
Whenever I find myself in a chaotic “season”, I relearn the lesson of surrender. I let go. I embrace faith.
I don’t necessarily do this at the beginning of the season, and I am miserable, emotionally and physically. But when I finally let go — either through a conscious choice or through exhaustion — peace of body, soul, and mind ensues.
i’m glad my words came at an appropriate time for you, michelle. surrendering is a difficult action. we tend to fight even the mere idea. thank you for sharing the beautiful imagery of what happens when you allow that release.
Chaos is all part of the journey, Love this April! I have stopped trying to analyze and over think my chaos, I tend to take a step back pause and take a look at whether it is productive or something that needs to sail by as everything does.
In those rare times of chaos, I keep myself grounded by focusing on the things I can control. I like living in a tidy, organized home and find that relaxes me. I steer clear of people that cause drama and establish boundaries with those people that I can’t avoid.
i’m with you, lori. when my environment is chaotic, my mind feels the same. and absolutely – avoiding drama is a must.
A beautifully emotive piece of poetry. Thanks for sharing April! x
thanks so much, jess. 🙂
Beautiful! Thanks so much for the inspiration and encouragement. Hm, chaos. I don’t really try to explain it. But it is something that I use to discover how to grow stronger, to continue to build a better life. Harmony is laying on warm sand with a light breeze, and the ocean waves saying hello.
what a lovely visual you paint with your words, sarah! i can picture myself on the warm sand, with the friendly waves welcoming me.
For me, surrendering the need to control the outcome has made all the difference. Love your poem. 🙂
i appreciate your input, viki. 🙂
I try my best not to explain, complain or ask why. I accept what is and try to move through it as best I can. Years ago, I would have answered these questions differently. But, I am wiser and very much mellowed.
Thanks April. Your writing always inspires me to think about my present moments.
thank you for your feedback, denise. i too find myself mellowing with age (lessons learned).
I’ve been trying to stop my attempts to explain the chaos, and to simply start living in the moment. In the here and now.
Which is hard for someone like me, whose mind is working non-stop.
But it has made me more peaceful. More mindful. More present.
i am constantly reminding myself to slow my mind’s whirling thoughts. mindfulness has such a calming effect on all that we do. thank you for your insightful words, laura.