I’m sad when I drink the last drop of my morning coffee. Afforded the luxury of working/schooling from home, I have a well-proven ritual that allows me to ease into my day . . . time to plan my schedule, journal my feelings and ideas, read motivational words, be inspired. It’s always a lovely new beginning that I look forward to with much anticipation.
When the cup is empty, however, it is time for action. I feel ready at that point (remember – I’ve been inspired), but my good intentions are not always brought to satisfying completion. And lately, I just haven’t felt as if I can do it all. It seems that when I make progress in one area, I let another slide.
I often present The Wheel of Life to my clients to see which areas they may be ignoring or where they may not be feeling fulfilled. Together we see if the wheel rolls smoothly, and if/where it may be out of balance. Then my clients (usually) commit to paying attention to ALL aspects of their lives.
But you know what? I’ve recently decided that I’m not going to approach this exercise in quite the same way anymore. I think it’s time to . . .
SHAKE THINGS UP!
It just might be important:
- to go for a bumpy ride once in awhile
- to understand that, at different times in our lives, one area may be rightfully highlighted over another
- to truly engage in the metaphorical spoke that’s demanding our full attention right now
- to know that we are not only the sum of our parts and to seek holistic integration of the hub instead
- to realize that, over time, all the pieces will work together, combine, complement one another . . . to produce our own uniqueness
Each facet of our existence is integral and necessary to the completeness of the whole. Yet, according to the Bicycle Stack Exchange, “You can ride home with a broken spoke. You can even ride home with several broken spokes. Just don’t bounce around a lot.”
The true essence of our souls will shine through, whether we are immersed in that mythical balance or not.
Things I need each day:
- coffee
- words
- sunshiny warmth
- pen and paper
- hugs from my family
- a challenge, an accomplishment
- laughter and connection
- movement
The rest is simply icing on the cake. (Or should I say – additional ways to pump up the tire?)
What are your thoughts on keeping your life in balance? I welcome the discussion.
I love the wheel of life and revisiting it for myself and for my clients as often as possible. I love your list of non-negotiables April. Thank you for the inspiration 🙂
I absolutely love and agree that sometimes, things gotta get a bit bumpy.
It’s like the storm before the clearing kind of thing.
Great post + some lovely reminders to visit that wheel (and potentially shore up any gaps that have been bumping a bit too long :).
In my training at Duke Integrative Medicine, we used something called the “Wheel of Health” – almost identical to your wheel of life with slightly different labels. I so identify with that last sip of coffee…but I know there is always more to come 🙂 What keeps me in balance? My own mind…when I live in the moment, nothing could be better. Simple as that! Thanks for another great post and your honest sharing, April.
I wrote a blog post once that compared people to english muffins. What! Well, if you like english muffins like I do, then you know how much better they taste when you break them open with a fork instead of cut them with a knife. Breaking them open gives them lots of nooks and crannies just perfect for melted butter…the same is true with people when things get rough…IT’S THE BUMPS THAT MAKE US BETTER.
Couldn’t agree with you more April!
I couldn’t agree more with this approach, April. How refreshing! I think it’s totally true that sometimes imbalance is exactly what we need. IT’s that healthy amount, or the not bouncing around too much when missing a few spokes, that’s important.
Yes!! There are certain non-negotiable a that are important each day! We share a lot of the same things on oir list. When I look at my week I try to see the overall balance. That has been what works best for me.
I like your take on the wheel of life, April. When I first used this exercise for myself and with my clients I felt as though we were always striving for something, for that ever-elusive “balance.” Now I see it more as a “noticing” practice, a point of inquiry. That feels so much more spacious. Much like food, yes? Some days I’m called to green smoothies and gogi berries. Other days, nothing but pasta will suffice! P.S. Our “needs” list is very similar, I would add “a delicious read.” xxoo
I love your Needs list April! As for balance, I think it’s important in the big picture, but you’re exactly right. There will be some moments and occasions where we will need to focus our attention on them, resulting in neglecting another area. There is no “pause” button on life. It just keeps going and moving, so when we are adjusting our attention, we are doing that to a moving wheel. Or juggling balls. So while it is ideal to have general balance, that doesn’t need to be measured every step (or roll) of the way. Great post!
I’ve realized lately how building a new online business has consumed me to the point that I have neglected my own self-care. There was so much to create and fine tune. At times — most times — I was overwhelmed. I’ve also been busy taking classes on health, business and skincare. My gift to myself this coming holiday season, is to decompress during the month of December. I’ve worked very hard and now deserve a break to relax and unwind. Enjoy your coffee! It really is a nice way to begin one’s day!
Hi April! I enjoyed reading this thought-provoking post. What an amazing morning routine you have! I’ve become really comfortable with being unbalanced lately – I just think of it as a matter or prioritizing. So what if I didn’t get the laundry all folded and put away, I managed to finish another client’s website and get my blog posts done! I like the idea of using the wheel of life as a check-in.
April, I feel so connected to you with this post! The first coffee ritual is so essential for me to start my day. I know exactly what you mean by that feeling of sadness after the cup is gone, I so relate. The imagery of the bike with some broken spokes is very telling of the life I myself lead now.
I like your take on this. I agree that there are certain things that I absolutely need, but outside of that, while it is ideal to nurture and have growth in every area of life, some areas demand more attention than others. My goal is to always be working toward having more balance, but I am not going to neglect areas of life that need attention either. Life is always a work in progress, and that is a beautiful privilege.
I totally agree with you on this. Having a well-balanced wheel of life is great as an ideal, but I find that on a daily basis, certain areas definitely demand more attention than others. And that’s okay. Love the idea of having a must-have list every day. For me: good food, hugs, connection with my family, achieving at least one business task a day, a lovely hot shower and reading.
Hi April – I think it’s a myth to have balance in life.. You work on one area predominently, until something starts pokin gyou for attention, then you work on that.. I like your things you need each day. It can really be unnerving when energy is out of likter when these things are missing.
I love how you’re shaking things up, April! And I agree – my brand used to be based on the word “balance” (Mind, Body, Soul balance in particular), but I’ve found that word has been so misunderstood.
For me it’s never been about pieces of the pie, but rather my moment-to-moment awareness of all those things that are most valuable to me in any given moment and the understanding that energy will ebb and flow between them as long as I live consciously.
I used to use the balance wheel with clients, too. Then I also changed it and said that balance was more like a balance over time and I taught that we focus on different areas more than others sometimes. I totally agree with you :).